John 1:1: In the beginning was the Word, and the Word was with God, and the Word was God.

If the Word was God, than how can the plural sense, “words” be so harmful? Do we sometimes forget?

During the beginning stages of our custody battle, words were used often and flippantly. Many words that would come back into our home were shocking and laced with pain. Knowing that the children had been coached, we learned to pray through the comments and lean on God’s direction. Even as innocent as some comments may be, the children in the midst of being transformed to alienate, would remain loyal and attack us with the words. As Godly parents, it was our responsibility to get the children back on the right track. We defined the time as a “detox period”. Slowly giving them time to readjust back into our home. Below is a short list of the "word battles" during the readjustment time:

You don’t have to listen to them; they’re not your real parents.

You're not going to have fun over there, I don't know why you even want to go.

That’s not home, this is your home. You just visit over there.

He doesn't really love you anymore; he only comes to visit you because the courts force him to spend time with you. He only loves his new family.

The minute you get over there call me. I want to know you’re safe!

You better tell me everything they said about me.

I can’t buy that for you, your dad doesn’t give me any money.

He doesn’t care about you or us.

You’re so stupid to believe they care about you.

I hate you…you act just like your dad!

Our detox time was difficult. Often the grandparents on the other side alienated them as well. With the kids returning home, you could see the confusion as they had a strong sense of trust with the grandparents. "Mee Maw and Pee Paw used to love you daddy, why do they tell me you don't love me anymore?" "Daddy, why do I have to call you Mark now ?" With the entire extended family joining in on PAS, Amy never could adjust. The retching pain in her soul of choosing sides, was too much for her to bear.

One day my oldest daughter came home sharing with me about her dad’s new friend. She told me that she was very nice, pretty and smart. Then she asked me a very strange question, “Mom…..is it okay if I love her”? I was sort of surprised that she would ask me that question. Why was she seeking to gain permission from me? I stopped and reassured my daughter that she could love anyone she wanted to love. I found out later one of the reasons why my daughter loved her so much. She would warm up the syrup before she poured it on the pancakes. How blessed I was to know this person loved my daughter enough to take the extra time to warm the syrup!

If your child is having a hard time, seems confused as to what to do with the new parent or potential parent in their life. Please, step-up to the plate, swallow your pride and offer the support and the kind words of our Mighty God. Be grateful, the new “influence” loves your child. You may not understand it now, but you’re teaching a lifestyle to that child. John 13:34 “A new command I give you: Love one another. As I have loved you, so you must love one another.